Is it possible to experience an image of joy in the midst of grief? Of pain? I know it is. Let me tell you how…
Jesus said, “Bless those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” If we do not experience grief, we cannot know comfort. Joy often comes paired with pain. Such is life, as the Lord well knew when he spoke these words from His sermon on the mount, as recorded in the Gospel of Matthew, chapters 5-7.
Looking back, what I did not know in life was that we can grieve more than the loss of a loved one. There are many kinds of losses in life, and in a life lived with MS, the losses ever increase. It’s a slow death of burying abilities.
I have gone through the cyclic stages of grief so many times I’ve lost track. Someday, I will have nothing else to grieve over except my life, and indeed by that time, I’ll be willing to surrender it without much fuss and be ready to leave a body that has betrayed me for years.
Recently, one night as I fell asleep I prayed and asked the Lord for some image of hope for the future that I could hold onto, and I saw something unexpected.
In a flash of a vision, He clasped His hand in mine as we leaped and ran through a knee-high field of non-yet-ripened, blue-green wheat. We laughed, like children without a care, the wheat flapping against our legs, and I felt nothing but sheer joy.
This is the image God gave me when I begged Him for something to hold onto, like an anchor, as I navigate these very stormy seas. He is good to give us what we need, and I will forever hold this in my mind as my disability continues to worsen, knowing that my real life is hidden with God in Christ, and someday my spirit and/or body will run untethered as never before.
God knows what you need, my friend. Ask Him for it, and He will supply your needs from His riches in glory.
Be blessed, Jenny
My upcoming novel, In a Grove of Maples, inspired by my grandparents and their lives as Wisconsin farmers in the late 1890’s, releases on Thursday! I am excited to share Beryl and Edward Massart’s story with readers. If you enjoy historical fiction with an inspirational theme, you’ll be endeared to the Massart’s tale of enduring love in the midst of trials, grief, and separation.