My heartbeat throbs in my left ear as if I’m hearing it’s pulse underwater, coughing ravages my throat raw, and I imagine my head as a ginormous stuffed mushroom. The slick taste of menthol cough drops coat my tongue. All this from—a summer cold.
I rarely get a cold, but when I do, it debilitates me. My other health conditions usually become exaggerated. My fatigue worsens. A chronic state of serious snail sluggishness becomes my norm for a while.
I used to get so upset with my weak body and its failings, but now I have learned to slow down when illness comes calling. I was always the type of person—the mom—who would push through how crappy I felt to accomplish my everyday tasks and take care of everyone else. Now I do not have that luxury. When my body says, “You must rest,” I rest.
The chores will still be there tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and the day after that. If I don’t listen, I pay for it. I can no longer push through the pain and fatigue of illness. When I have, I’ve had my feet knocked out from under me. You know the feeling of getting the wind knocked out of you? Well, that’s pretty much what happens when I don’t listen to the whispered caution in my ear . . . “Go rest, or you’ll regret it.” “Put your feet up, and sit in the recliner for a while.” Or my favorite which comes after my disobedience, “I told you so, you fool.”
Sigh . . . I have a long list of projects I need to accomplish this week, connections I need to make to get my novel, Ruby Moon, out there in my corner of the world, but I have a fairly clear idea that those will have to be set aside.
I’ve learned a thing or two over the years. (Thank God.) We have an inner voice for a reason. I believe we have all manner of inner voices vying for our attention. Some of which are prone to lead us astray, but I’m talking about the one which cautions us. It may be prompted by: the voice of God, our past experience come to speak its mind, or what we call our conscience voice or reason. Whatever it may be, I’ve learned to attune my ears to it.
Do you listen to your inner voice of caution? What does it caution you about? For me it’s usually something health related. A few times it’s been relationship based. Ya, I won’t go into that one. It’s for another post. When I refuse to listen to my inner CAUTION voice shouting, things go awry. In fact I can’t think of one time life worked out better when I chose not to listen. Can you?
I think I’ll sit in my chair and do a mediation exercise today with the picture of the waterfalls in my mind. I’ve gotten out of the practice, and it will foster an atmosphere for healing to begin. Because really, doesn’t all healing begin in the mind?